Prize giving at Awatapu College, December 2014

It wasn't just the trumpet fanfare and the odd Oxford Don getup from the staff; it wasn't just the pomposity of the way they walked somberly onto the stage, it was our feelings of disconnection at going to an event celebrating our daughter with a large group of people(including the teachers) we did not know.My local people call this 'normal'. It felt abnormal. And weird because we were celebrating our daughter's honours at this prize giving-which conspired to make it a mixture of happiness, sadness, loneliness, frustration and confusion,
The upside is that it was like watching vaudeville. Every minute or so I could perceive the seat shaking-either me or Alice suppressing guffaws. A few tidbits for voyeurisms sake.
The 'head boy' gives the Wikipedia head boy's speech. His grandest moments were 3 years in the first fifteen and a camp somewhere. Nothing mentioned of the core purpose of schools-educational achievement.Switch to my memories of the Waiopehu College principal Barry Petherick saying, at the end of year prize giving, the yearly camp-(which as I have mentioned before, sorted out the privileged from the not) was likely to be the biggest event and memory of your school experience! I'm sure the head boy's a nice guy- but more than likely a puppet and a product of the system. Sadness as I know he will more than likely have a family and succumb and subject them to this same system.
Then the awards: Now I'm not cynical about showing appreciation, being acknowledged for your effort, talent and so on but.............Excellence in rugby? Merit in rugby? I spose, why not? Everyone wins a prize at this prize giving. Here was I thinking that it was NCEA and these students got Merit in rugby! No, it was the school's prize-giving, I found out later.They had just borrowed the Eduspeak vernacular.
And the singing of the National Anthem, crap lyrics and all! Why are schools singing the National Anthem? Are we kind of grouping ourselves here, identifying with 'National Pride' and equating doing well at school to being a good patriot? And if you don't do well, or you abhor the fervour of flag waving? What then? You aren't a good citizen, dummy! As always, I sat in my seat; refusing to kowtow to pressure or shame. I'll not call anyone sir (except by choice) and I'll not join any Nationalistic or Religious sentiment, lest I wind up thinking I'm right and good and you're wrong and bad.

Boys become men-a Rite of Passage

I just got back from a 'Rite of Passage' event where young men are initiated into the circle of men. No 21st yardglass, no meaningless key to the door that's long been opened, no first beer, no car accident and funeral-no 'self initiation' that is commonplace in this country and the 'civilised world' generally. No, we took boys gently through a loving, supported, but difficult experience that acknowledges their transition from the world of the boy to the world of men.
We acknowledge birth, birthdays that are important, marriage and death. We mark these transitions in rituals built up by our group-our culture.But we have forgotten how to bring girls and boys into the world of women and men. We must therefore journey it alone in confusion and 'hunger games' -like sacrifice to the gods of the marketplace. They show the way. For boys that way is the way of the eternal boy-exterior displays of power over others, bravery and machismo that are rarely felt within as true sources of power, Witness these on the internet and the news media. Uninitiated men look to uninitiated older men, who themselves are still boys, for guidance, reassurance and encouragement acknowledgement and acceptance. They find almost nothing and they become the vacuous spirits of today's men.
Contrast this to the full strata of men being present to the boys dreams, struggles and demons. Contrast this to the honest sharing of stories from the elders and the youngers, themselves ceremonied into the men's circle in earlier ceremonues. Men from 16 to their 70's taking them through a major and difficult mental, emotional and physical challenge that will push them to the limit; but not alone. They will be held in the arms of many fathers (usually with a ratio of 4 men to each boy). These men and boys are taken from their homes and families in ceremony and reality; taken to the place of men and mentored and then returned to the family, the community and the world.
This is no secret handshake ra ra ra funny hats stuff.
It was a moving, powerful, exhausting, exhilarating 5 days. it takes everyone to the edge of their comfort zone. I took a young man through with me-I stood in for his father who was not available. When I first wanted to take my son through this transition I sought knowledge from other cultures who still keep these rites alive. A friend was also looking for something for his son. I was relating our journey to a friend, when he said Oh you mean like Tracks? I said Tracks, whats that? That was the beginning of a connection with an organisation that has been doing these rites of passage for girls and boys for over 10 years. It came from the men's movement- groups of men who freely chose to enter into a hallowed space of shared experience, encouragement, belonging. When I first went with my son to his own rite of passage 5 years ago, my experience of meeting with men was limited, like many men, to the pub, the sports dressing room or clubroom-culturally acceptable ways men tried to get together. I had had some experience, through the Catholic church, of groups of men getting together, but it was always filtered through our shared Christianity and so missing some of the grime and reality of our patchy lives. And not fully concious of the value of men getting together.Or able to accept men regardless of beliefs.So it was with great relief, comfort, grief that I was able to be a part of a group who supported the boys through the transition. I felt great sadness both because of my own extremely poor transition and also for letting go of my son,I found other men with similar stories; some much worse and sadder. How we initiated ourselves then.
My life partner has just returned from a similar journey with our daughter
My hope and dream is realizing this vision for all our youth. It is part of my desire to reform the village with it's humanity and it's sanity!

Pink Transformer by Duncan Hill-a painting about aborted rites of passage and the aftermath
Oil on canvas (for sale POA)

Over the week you notice a change in the young man's way of  what I call 'standing in their own presence'-which is the best way I can describe a certain look in the eye which does not hide itself in the grass, a straightening of stature, a confidence in the voice. you notice a joy and peace that you normally associate with older men.
The organisation Tracks is open to applications to take boys through the Rite of Passage for men, as is its sister organisation, Tides. Check out www.tracks.net.nz 

Me doing a live art gig at the Chilean Embassy

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Beware the Opportunity Ghouls, lift your head

Beware the Opportunity Ghouls. They wait in unsuspecting emails, they prowl the empty streets saying "the streets are full and here is the key" that turns out to be a fake cardboard key that wilts in the rain of the tears of my sorrowful culture. Beware the Opportunity Ghouls who do not value what you do but gain your confidence and trust-they have no trust in either you or themselves. They have made this world, yet complain about it.
Instead view everything as a gift from the Beloved (substitute your word for this ). Yes, even your suffering. It is this view that has the joy in it. You create your joy with this view.
Value everything you do, say or think. This is a powerful force that creates worlds. Then, when everyone values themselves and others we will have real opportunities which recognise, support, enrich, create a sense of belonging, meaning, capacity, and power,

Communicating betterer; beginning a language of life

I had an unfortunate conversation with my neighbour  over a period of the last 2 days. Their stock animals have been grazing on our land in full view of their house. Over the years I have noted that they never take them off until we complain. So I communicate this and the reasons why we need the grass; or alternatively if we want to share or enter into some kind of arrangement,then lets do so.At the moment its a bit one-sided.
This is a typical farm neighbour situation-trouble over the fencing of stock. The neighbour is so aggressive I have chosen to put notes in the mailbox-a point which I expressed some regret and hope that we could be able to at least talk in the future.
I get a letter back which begins with "You're a liar!" and ends with"So shut up!" It is full of past resentments (the neighbour unsurprisingly has cancer), judgements,  defensiveness. I don't want to go into the details of it; it isn't my point.
I'm disappointed at the way that  we as a culture communicate.I have, in the last 2 and a half years been involved in overhauling my own language, and adopting a new one. Like many old habits, they can be hard to break. The new way cuts out judgement, criticism, put downs etc, and instead asks one to look at feelings and the underlying needs, wants and values that aren't being met. It goes further, to asking oneself and others for something which might help fulfill that need, value or want. The languages intention is to connect with others in a real, deep and human way.
This 'language of life' asserts that negative feelings (such as fear, guilt, anger etc) arise from unmet parts of our lives.And on the other hand, positive feelings(such as joy, peace and excitement) arise from these 'needs' being met.
It is profound and it works. It doesn't work in the currently popular means of getting your needs met at the expense of others- the tough love approach pervading our parenting meetings and schools. The fallout from that is silent resentment, depression, acting out of fear, shame or guilt. It has an unsatisfied party in the conversation.It breaks down connection between people. It also teaches bullying behaviour ie the getting ones demands met by coercion, creating fear and using force. You can see the results of this on the world stage as a country awakes, angry, and rids itself of a dictator.Rather it assumes the worth of the people involved in communicating. It assumes that getting what you want doesn't mean that the other doesn't get what they want.
I'm a fan.Its creator says it embodies spiritual values most of us subscribe to: loving your neighbour as yourself, peace, trust, compassion and so on They always struck me as great words, but how to put them into action-how to 'do' love- was missing. Also I'm programmed to start blaming, judging, criticising,comparing and that's hard to shift.I was bought up with it at home, school and the greater world.
I have successfully used this new language in the classroom, at home and with my family and friends. Dont worry, I still sound like me-you won't need an interpreter. But you and I may feel quite different during and at the end of our conversation.
This isnt an advertorial, but if you want to look at it more there are ways to learn it. Have a look at www.NVC.org.nz

Iceland is thawing; we are freezing

Ok, I went to hear this guy from Norway Hordur Torfason who was right at the epicentre of Iceland's 2008 "Cutlery Revolution". We went to get ideas about how to react when our own country faces such a crisis. We went to a special private meeting at the Art Museum Hotel which was pretty brief -it wasnt a good place to meet and the Hotel staff politely moved us on. And then to a public talk at the Paramount where about 500 people gathered  to hear the man.He is a very effective speaker and a man on a serious mission-to tell the world about the possibilities of change,the potential of simple human contact.
 It occurred to me that we will have to wait till something really critcal happens here as it did in Iceland-the banks were closed-the country was bankrupt-before we see the changes they have witnessed there. We are still at the stage where life goes on as usual for a significant part of the population; we can still deny these underground seismic shifts.Some clearly cant-there are thousands of people out there in NZ desperate and poor.As someone remarked in a restaurant later "Its just not us".
So any day now that 'event' will come,and surely so will anger and fear and then we will rally and throw them out and create a more fair economic system which will include making the creation of money a government task (instead of bank loan officers as is the present),an overhaul of the banking system,the eradication of interest on loans.I'm really clear on not vilifying the powermongers-we need to recreate our institutions so that they serve us, that's all. This horrible way of doing things in our working lives,the excitement of consumption, the ruthless, competitive and dominating paradigm which infects our schools,religions,families communities and workplace  needs to give way to the enjoyment of meaningful  work,prosperity,participation (in work recreation,decision making, community) respect for our planet which sustains us,the value of a future for all the inhabitants of earth, not just humans.

Go on, truant!

Break the back of this disease we call school. Its an aberration. Go on get out of there.Run and dont look back.Run into your life.
They have been running a campaign in our local town to rescue truants from certain peril (see my earlier blog) by not serving them in their shops.The jury is out on whether truants,returned to school,are ever the successes one local principle is quoted as calling 'research'. Depends on how you measure success. If you mean they complete their compulsory education,I wouldn't call that a success. Completion of schooling isnt success-. in the same way that lack of war is not peace.I would like to read that research.
Now a little guessing game: Who do you think truants from school? Children from a higher, middle, or low income demographic? Families or parents who are interested or who arent interested? You're right so far. Could we say that they rightly perceive (the truant child and the family) that school offers nothing for them? Is staying at school going to launch them on a career path to law or med school? Something about the whole problem smells of exclusion,privelege and a caste system.
I read an interesting Scottish Study of truancy recently. Its worth a look http://dspace.gla.ac.uk:8080/bitstream/1905/251/1/072.pdf  I noted that the overwhelming majority of kids in the study wagged because they were bored. I'd imagine the same results would be found here in NZ. So what do we say to that? The idealogues would contend that we have to entertain them with technology to get them 'engaged' in learning;to use eduspeak Their point of view is-it's obviously the kids fault.I would also bet that alot of these children would be the first to say its their fault,that they are lazy or badly behaved.We have The Perfect Society where the victims of shoddy systems are the biggest fans of the system that oppresses them..Natural learners would say let the children decide what they want to do.We did..And it worked.
When I was given the job to watch the gates at school during recess (keeping the inmates from escaping), I was frequently approached by young people begging to be allowed to go to the shop-a 200 metre walk in view of my station. I would engage them,and suggest that they were in a type of jail and that I was given the job of warden. These students were men and women;not children.In the rest of their lives,they were free to go to any retail store, drive a motor vehicle, make decisions about where and who to spend their time with. but for some reason it was considered dangerous for them to pick up a bag of potato chips from the local dairy. I mean,they might run away and never come back! That's ludicrous; the whole town would scoured for them and they would be in trouble from school authorities (and possibly from home).

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Examining exams

Righto,so i think exams are dumb.To explain why I came to this view I will look at(examine haha) some of the assumptions and premises which are taken for granted.Here's the commonly held rationale behind them: You need to test what people know. Now,don't teachers spend time with students?Ask any teacher around mid year,mid semester-do you know what your students know?I have asked; most know what they know.They have spent time with them.Once apon a time that's just what teachers did.They were entrusted and trained to do just that-see how students are going and work with them to assist them and mentor them .Now we have a 'low trust' model operating-its not enough for you to know your students and them you.
The second rationale is you need to have a pressure cooker system to make people learn better.Why do we create a stressful exam environment,with clocks ticking and success linked to them? If we want to test for how well we do under stress,why dont we say that?Why link it to the subject? It could be a subject in its own right-How to Solve Problems Under Strict Deadlines. Somehow we got to the insanity we have in the school system (and beyond) where we mistake learning for solving problems against time.There is no evidence that anxiety improves learning-on the contrary there is plenty of evidence to show that anxiety makes learning, thinking and doing harder.And for many if not for all,exams are anxiety producing.
The third rationale behind exams is that you should try and catch students out by 'surprises"- another cruel ploy by a system that fails to understand why and how people learn.Catching them out may reassure insecure teachers of the fact that they know something that students don't,but it doesn't have anything to do with learning.More erroneous beliefs are that learning is associated with discomfort,punishment,force or coercion.
I don't support assessment of any kind anymore.It drives down morale and self esteem,most people know their strengths and weaknesses very well.Teachers use it to what I call 'negatively teach'-the weird belief that pointing out failures and mistakes is the role of the teacher,and that they will do better if they are told.Mostly I've seen this when its used exclusively as a teaching strategy.The light goes out from the students' eyes and pretty soon they give up (inside). An analogy: Its like felling a tree in the forest to make it grow better.
An anecdote from a friend whose son recently delved into his favourite Classics subject.He loved it; its his passion. He produced an amazing document for a project but was told he only 'achieved' and did not gain 'excellence' (the New Zealand School system classifies work in terms of not achieved,achieved,merit or excellence) because his project was too long.That sort of petty meddling makes me really angry,especially because the odds are so high that this fellow will now feel deflated and lose interest in a subject he formerly loved.
One reason to support assessment is that an employer or a third party who wants to know something about a student can look at formal bits of paper and get an idea of their strengths etc.
My son has been mesmerised into thinking that he might not know anything about a subject-depending on how well he does in his exams-despite the fact that he his at the top of this particular class! Wak!! What the hell?Dont get your hopes up,it might be all dashed on the rocks! The end result is the mantra "don't trust what you know,you might be wrong"

Westpac theft: the real story

Funny story 1.Guy and girl find $10 million accidentally in Westpac bank account.Couple jumps on plane to Aussies and beyond, Eventually get caught and given a conviction and sentence (over 4 years for the guy).Some public outcry over the lenient sentences for 'theft'.
Funny story 2: Bank gets deposit from Joe and Josie Public.Bank lends out 20 times the amount and in effect and in reality creates money out of thin air.The amount of money is increased and it's inflationary,as it doesn't stand for anything.People are in catchup mode and the environment must be pillaged to account for the the discrepancy.Worse,the interest on the loan means its even more to add to the money supply,and everyone is forced to 'grow' to keep up.
No one goes to jail.No one gets accused of 'theft'
Funny story 3: Huge NZ company pays no tax by hiding money overseas and making an impossible paper trail to cover their tracks.The country has lost hundreds of millions of dollars in revenue and this loss is borne by every citizen.Company director receives public recognition for making a big business and employing alot of people.No one is accused of or charged for 'theft'.
If you want to understand how this can be, check out Positivemoney.org.nz or read Dierdre Kent's book Healthy Money,Healthy Planet or if you're more audio listen to this podcast interview on Radio NZ Kim Hill's programme.
http://podcast.radionz.co.nz/sat/sat-20111112-0810-raf_manji_money_and_the_economy-048.mp3

Voting for change.My experience in standing for a local electricity company board

I had a go at nominating nyself for the board of  a locally owned power company,Electra.I was quite pleased to get 1450 votes-out of a total of around 10,000 votes spread over 6 candidates.That equates to around 24%-a typical voter turnout at local body and even general elections.Thank you for believing in my voice.
I'm pretty sure that the people who dont vote are the ones who do worst out of the status quo-they believe in their powerlessness.And I'd be equally sure that the people who do vote have alot invested in the way things are now.Power depends on maintaining this system.I have a friend who supports everything in this culture that denigrates him;hes one of the biggest fans of the competitive,agressive economic model that we take for given.Its astounding to me.but I am so grateful for the fact that he has shown me insights into how it could be possible.He merely thinks hes not up to the job of full participation in our community,but 'they' are. They being someone elso who is able,brainy,responsible, clever, creative,knowledgeable, powerful. All the things he thinks hes not.
Anyway,sadder still (I dont want to harp on) is that a local identity famous for battling the mayor and councillors on a variety of issues,has said that I shouldnt have put 'poet' on my nomination form! Wak! So the implication is people wont vote for poets because........they are going to be flaky and idealistic and poorly organised and probably smoke weed and..............

Well, we are coming to the end of an era where our inflated view of bean counters,Bigmen (guys that have their values born of the current economic system and are mean, competitive and adversarial as a result,not afraid to be 'assertive' to get things done,good speakers,duplicitous in terms of saying one thing and doing another- things we associate with 'leadership' and 'business')are the very guys who got us in trouble. They do not  have the answers to an evolving society where new demands for power sharing,economically tenable,diverse,meaning- filled existence are being made.

 I say bring on the poets, the musicians, the fencers,the bakers,the healers,the labourers, the right brainers. Holy crap,these are exactly the people we want leading in the new age approaching us.

Footnote:We need the accountants,the list makers,the Bigmen for public speaking.We just need some other people as well,people who have experience in a wide range of fields,not just business.

Can you feel it?

This thing we are witnessing-the collapse of the old paradigm-I have been aware of for decades.My time is here,what I (and many others) have been saying is no longer cause for sniggering.Heres a poem I wrote a few years back.


We're building a boat


We're building a boat

Hull hard as bone

Supple as sinew and flexible as history

You need that on the high seas and low latitudes

Able to carry cargo and swarthy crew

Repositories of synthesized human wisdom carefully stowed;

Inventory

1. The last seeds

2. Boxes of old bones

3. Single celled organisms two by two

4. The things you might need; Novels that are a good read

  

Chandlery

Sails we’re stitching from quilts of pure energy

And invention and imagination

To blow patterns of energy on her billow-

Adaptable and flexible and modest are the sails

The rudder is sturdy and reliable as a hand

Calloused from hauling on sheets and working the land

Yet persistant and gentle, keeping the faith they were

Finger pointing to who knows where

On its bowsprit a fine carving

Of every face of every human and animal and plant

The mast we’re fashioning as straight and true as our intention

To carry this journey through

On the deck lies embedded

A diamond cosmic compass

Dial and bezel read the stars, the spirit world, reason, gaia, nature, intuition, sound, maritime maps, feeling

We threaded charts with glass beads and shells

From nearly worn out texts and scrolls and computer printouts

Singing sea shantys all the while

Laughter to get you through the doldrums

     All to lead us past the reefs of fallen warriors, women, children, civilisations

     All to weather the storms of human creation

The anchor we’re forging from human tenacity

It is heavy iron to wait out the strong tides that pull 

Or hide from the storm in the bay

Or weigh at that island of the mind where you rest and take on provisions and  crew

 R and R we think important too

     Were building a boat

     She’s almost afloat

     We’re signing up crew

     Hope its you

I heard a woman from Israel saying that in her country people are getting together.Now in my country thats hard,but in her racially,religiously divided country where people are raised to be pitted against one another,its a miracle.The reason? They realised what they all wanted was:a house, clean water,good food, a village to belong to,some inclusion and activity which was meaningful.That doesn't matter if you are Muslim or Christian,Arab or Jew.That's the new thing that's happening.its not a protest for change,it is change.